Who is She?
March 04, 2017

This Week's Verbatim

Overheard in room:
Senior aesthete: I saw three midgets get into Berghain before I got rejected.
Overheard at Rojo's:
Desperately lonely boy: The president of the Stanford Chess Club is smoking hot. You can play her live on Facebook right now. Should I?
Overheard in Patton:
Former Press Club President, wearing a "Chance 3" hat: Do you have your Marx on you?
Overheard outside 1901:
Charming guy: She seems hot, but not after you spend three days in the wilderness with her.
Overheard in seminar:
Marxist professor, to giant bug on the table: Engels!
Overheard in Patton T12:
Nass EIC: As a non-Jewish woman, I spun the dreidel and won.
Overheard in Small World:
Prospective Georgetown applicant, to Princeton interviewer: Do you know who Cory Booker is?
Overheard in Washington DC:
Some guy: There were lots of woke people at the Women's March, including the guy who got kicked out of my co-op at Berkeley for being a misogynist.
Overheard at Princeton:
Man on phone: Apart from Harvard, what do you have experience doing?
Overheard in Prospect Garden:
Visiting mother: Wow, this is great, I feel like I'm on a retreat. Such great weather, such beautiful trees, such cute boys. What more could you ask for?
Overheard at national publication:
Berkeley artsy trash boy, putting hair in half-ponytail: Honestly, the only time I do my hair like this is when I'm at my climbing gym.
Overhead in Ivy:
St. A's senior: I might go to 7-11 for a slurpee and cigarettes.
Overheard at TI:
Aesthete, sipping on IPA: This tastes like my acne medication.
Overheard at Terrace:
Lead singer: Like all of you, we are trapped in a capitalist hellscape.
Overheard by elevator:
Boy 1: Who is that blond girl in Cottage in your profile picture? She was in my Dostoevsky seminar.
Boy 2: She's one of my best friends.
Boy 1: I feel like club sailing has some of the most diverse affiliations.
Overheard in seminar:
Judaic Studies professor, commenting on ancient text: What can we tell from this character's name? (waits for response) Well, he was clearly a nice Jewish boy.