Literary Issue

April 28, 2005

Verbatim

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Overheard on the second floor of Frist

Sophomore Theta 1:  Yeah, well, she was just too fat.  It would have been one thing if she had, you know, a really good personality to make up for it. But she didn't so we hosed her.
Hosed girl:  That's what they told me last year.  They told me I was too fat and my personality wasn't good enough.  I cried for like, five  months.
Sophomore Theta 2:  That's ridiculous. You are NOT fat.  I mean, you are like, one of my best friends, so you're obviously not fat and you obviously have a good personality.
*Hosed girl gets really red in the face and starts sniffing back tears.*
Sophomore Theta 3:  Yeah, you're like, the hottest girl in the school. You're just too good looking for Theta.
Sophomore Theta 1:  Yeah, you're definitely really hot.  It's so weird that they hosed you.

Overheard in LAT336

Preppy Classics Major: He made fun of my seersucker jacket, so I made fun of his lineage.

Overheard at the Dodgeball Tournament’s championship match between Cap and the BSU

Spectator: I don't want to be politically incorrect, but this is either one of two things: a dodgeball tournament or a race riot.